Reflections on my journey at blogher’s conference…

Just posted a summary of my ‘take homes’ from blogher 08….a conference for women bloggers held for 4 days in San Francisco….

I’m learning I can’t copy/paste from their site to this blog…so here’s the link of my post on their site….and next time I’ll write it here and then link it to blogher.

If you blog and wanna know more about this conference, feel free to email me.

More on the conference here on my blog in another little while….

Take care,

Tre ~

A shift in perspective offers new views of oneness

An unwanted change in a relationship…
A desire to leave the familiar when it’s too painful to live amidst…
A yearning for a new beginning…

Sometimes the urgency you feel to get over hurt, painful feelings keeps us in 5th gear moving full steam ahead.

Heck, with me, I know there’s been a few times I’ve just scaled down to whatever I can fit in my car and hit the road, sometimes driving from one coast til another only stopping because there wasn’t anywhere further west that I could drive.

And while change in scenery, getting rid of stuff, and acquiring new props can alter your surroundings rather quickly, shifts in the heart take a bit longer.

By shifts in the heart, I’m meaning the letting go of loving someone.

So how do you get there? To that place? Where you’ve moved past anger, resentment and pain from being unloved or from not being able to connect with the someone you felt you were in love with?

To me, it’s a moment to moment journey…one that requires not so much a welling up of anger every time you think of him or her…but a willingness to trust that what governs your now propels you into those situations, experiences, and relationships which support you, and sustain your journey every moment.

And so this means that this same influence may cause a natural –even though it doesn’t feel natural—parting of that which doesn’t support you or your journey.

What I continue to see is that often a ‘no’ is really a yes to other things. And this can be a huge comfort when the parting is unwanted or unexpected like a divorce or a break up.

While it takes practice and a disciplining of thought, if you feel overwhelmed with utter emptiness over the thought of not having him or her in your life anymore, try as ever you are able to get still and hush the mental arguing and murmuring in your thinking.

You know…all that stuff that says “I should have been this way or that way” or “he should have done this or that” or whatever….And I’m being really generic here…but you know …all those thoughts that blame, accuse, condemn and most of all, the thoughts that condemn or accuse yourself.

Instead, when thought is still, bathe yourself in the truth that you are whole and complete this moment. You need no one at this moment to complete you or fulfil you. You are not empty, alone, afraid or unworthy of love.

Hug yourself in the knowledge that your very existence is the evidence of divine Love’s care and that each moment you are the expression of its whole being.

Because of this, any and all pangs of loneliness, fear, regret or anger, even though they come to mind as ‘what am I going to do?” or ‘How could s/he do that to me?” or ‘who am I gonna be with now?” or “who am I gonna share my moments with now”—even though the ego wears that disguise, it only gets you to respond because you are right now vulnerable in those areas.

To the degree that you fill yourself full with the simple truth that you are whole now…you are complete now…you are loved this moment and you are cared for and adored this moment, to the degree you allow these truths to flood your awareness, a few things will shift:
a. you will feel less and less pulled down by the suggestions of the ego.
b. you will be convinced less and less that those sentiments are the truth(the fear, emptiness, anger, or regret).
c. you will start to feel a perpetual stillness that completes you and allows you to feel peace within.

In looking back over the last decade, I see where time and again my pain lessened to the degree I applied these lessons. And what’s more, my thoughts reopened to sharing my life in new ways. There wasn’t always a new relationship. Often times I had months of solodom. But never ‘alone-dom.’

More and more I am seeing that while the desire to partner with another is a beautiful hope, the ability to evolve a sense of completeness within as a perpetual being, regardless of whether you’re in or out of relationship, is really key to days filled with a consistent sense of joy and peace.

Undisturbed by f.e.a.r. (false evidence appearing real)

Ask yourself: no holds barred, what would it take to move forward in spite of collective opinion that declares you’ll fail?

To me, it would take, and does take, the determination and courage to mentally carve out what are your innermost desires, chart out some kind of path to follow that forwards your pursuit of them, and then press on.

In spite of collective opinion.

David Cook’s winning of American Idol is a fresh example of the value of doing so.

In spite of even the judges’ opinions on the night of the finals, he triumphed and won.

I’m thrilled for him. Beyond just loving rock and appreciating the uniqueness of his talents as a singer and guitar player, his win is a symbol for me in my current day to day and moment to moment o press on….

I’m not going for a win on American Idol.

I’m going for moment to moment sculpting my thought, carving enduring serenity, a life of consistent joy and peace, love and fulfillment.

But even though I know these goals embody the hunk of marble that is our true life’s substance, we gotta chisel thought to really reflect their depth and to reflect it consistently. Against opinion that often laughs at the attempt, says it’s not doable, or sways you to think any effort thereto is pointless.

In Science and Health’s 14th chapter Recapitulation, which formed the basis of her early instruction on the Science of Being Mary Baker Eddy taught at the college she founded–the Massachussetts Metaphysical College, she defines the nature of substance as “that which is incapable of discord and decay” (p. 468).

Her entire answer is here:

“Answer.–Substance is that which is eternal and incapable of discord and decay. Truth, Life, and Love are substance, as the Scriptures use this word in Hebrews: “The substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Spirit, the synonym of Mind, Soul, or God, is the only real substance. The spiritual universe, including individual man, is a compound idea, reflecting the divine substance of Spirit. ” (p. 468)

I’ve come to see time and again that anything causing fear or intimidation is usually based on false evidence seeming or appearing real…and you can think of f.e.a.r abbreviated that way. Minimally, much that scares or intimidates, much that wants to thwart your innocence or stunt your progress is fear based and not ever that of substance.

The way to work through it thought by thought is to refuse to be misinfluenced by such suggestions. This is all they will ever be. Simply suggestions. Even if coming from a respected friend or relative. Even if coming from an admired celebrity. Even if coming from a judge on American Idol (because clearly that opinion was proved wrong).

Check thought hourly, moment by moment. See if what’s stopping you from pursuing your innermost desire is fear. If so, don’t be impressed. Press on. You owe this to yourself.

Imagine a world of each one of us living our authentic selves, undisturbed by public opinion or our own fear.

Imagine living your own life being consistently true to your inner core.

Now pause…and realize you can stop imagining… just go live this….thought by thought.

Get in touch if you wanna chat about how (email: evolveserenity@gmail.com or 305.394.1070).

Be well…

Grace, forgiveness, compassion endure….

Hey to all….

I’m writing a bit more to add to the former lengthy post….

Heather Armstrong of Dooce.com has added her 2cents on her experience being interviewed on the Today Show.

Kudos to Heather. She comments with poise, grace, and compassion…and albeit down right honesty. She tells all her readers that even before going live Kathy Lee Gifford expressed relatability on being criticized by viewers for speaking about her family on air. So prior to any live footage, the two were united in common ground: they know the value of sharing personal stories with viewers/readers. And they know the costs. But do it anyway.

Heather compassionately handles the retelling of then what happened on air.

She also goes a step further.

She invites others to interview bloggers to try to wrap their arms around why this endeavor is as successful for some as it is..what the validity is among blogging communities. In short she invites broadcast media to have another chance.

I applaud this response. She doesn’t offer any sense of hurt, torn ego or anger and resentment.

She treats this issue well and professionally.

Why do I write about it thus?

Because my own maturing sense of grace yearns to treat people this same way. I could list 100’s of times when my motives have been called into question, when my style is bawked or condemned. And regrettably, I can not boast having taken the higher ground 50% of the time.

Surely I’m learning to. But the ego gets in there, self justifies and basically says ‘well to heck w/ them. if they don’t get it, so be it. i don’t have time for this’ and moves on.

Hello.

Where is the humanity in that?

Now in fairness, I haven’t maintained that disposition for a few years probably more. But I’m still well aware of when my feelings have been hurt, when I’ve felt wrongly accused, criticized and even fired for misjudgements of my character or misinterpretations of my motives.

In the long run, I’ve learned and am learning still it is ALWAYS better to respond with grace, poise, and compassion. Forgiveness needs to come as well and will.

At one point in my journey I was offered a job I had to move cross country for. I was promised a great salary with benefits. Come to find out a few months into that scenario, the reality was the job was never really budgeted for and before 90 days was up I was given my notice.

Crushed, bewildered, frantic, and furious, I was angry…very. I became resentful and dug myself into a great big pit of despair for far too long to admit. I’d trusted, really felt it was a good fit and then whammo! Ousted before I had even acclimated to this new area.

Shortly thereafter I learned that even had the job been approved, my qualifications would not have measured up. Okay. Humbling to learn but okay.

Still, I fumed over this for a long, long while. It got personal. I spent way too much time being angry at a few people and myself as well. I felt so stupid, naive, and clammed up on my sense of trusting humanity. For a while I felt used, exploited and taken advantage of.

Lemme tell ya where those negative emotions got me. NOWHERE. Absolutely nowhere.

Anger and hatred, bitterness and resentment never get you anywhere. And sure, you can kid yourself that you’re gonna lock all that emotion up and put it into a mental trunck and never again open it, or that you’ll just not think about that stuff anymore and never trust THOSE people again.

Try it. You are kidding yourself if you can simultaneously maintain a sense of peace.

In fact, during the aftermath, a few months into the saga while I was volunteering in a few different capacities, still fuming inwardly from my rejection, I broke out with a heinous fever and was in bed for days. It was the dead of winter. And I had a dog to take care of. Fortunately my neighbors helped me. But at that point, I knew I couldn’t just stew on my anger.

I needed healing.

And in my life for healing I turn to prayer based on the ideas in Science and Health. Day in and day ou,t I prayed like I do whenever I am treating myself. And day by day the fever broke a bit. But it would zip back up to really uncomfortable levels.

Well, during this time, a few people came to mind who I’d locked up in the trunk of “You are justified to despise these individuals.” UGH! I can’t stand admitting I even felt this way. But I did.

YET, divine Love was doing its work….was striving to embrace me with innocence and bathe me in goodness and was having a tough time doing so because my sense of ego and will were just right up there justifying these feelings.

Wasn’t gonna cut it. You can’t strive to be the emanation of divine Love while also harboring anger and resentment and loathing anyone or anything.

Aware of this, I started to walk down that path of forgiveness. I didn’t want to. I ADMIT IT.

Self justification was all over this effort screaming “What are ya kiddin’ me? You have every right to loathe this person for what he/she did to you. They don’t deserve forgiveness.’

OH REALLY?

Think again.

For the next 24 hours, I thought about shifting my perspective and aiming to see spiritually each of these individuals I’d dumped into that mental trunk. Bit by bit I took my thoughts of each one and considered each of them as a child of God. And I asked myself over and over “Tre, how is divine Love seeing its expression as this person? Tre, is divine Love seeing an example of manhood or womanhood that it created that can harm another?”

In fact, the heinous things people do are moments of hiccups of behavior, attitude, being. They are not the true nature of that person. No one wake up and bounds outa bed to take advantage of someone. NO ONE DOES. If they do this, it’s because of a pattern of behavior. But it’s changeable and it’s not their true nature and substance.

As a spiritual seeker and person who practices the Science of Being as explained in Eddy’s Science and Health, I’ve vowed to take up all that opposes the true nature of someone and advocate for his or her true individuality. So nothing was different in my view of these people that had wronged me.

I needed to flush out all the ill will and anger I felt. I needed to stop thinking of them as heinous people and mean people and worthless people and no good people. I needed to see them purely, wholely spiritually.

Would my doing this inevitably change their outward dispositions and actions? Not necessarily. But it WOULD heal my wrong sense of them.

And this is key to healing.

It is not mine or yours to ensure that someone change their ways and be a poised, graceful, honest, fair, just, compassionate individual. It is our duty to insist that such is their true nature, regardless if we’re shown this behavior or not.

In my case, as I let go of all the hatred, as I sought to find each aspect of good that each one of these people manifested, my fever broke. It took a bit…but it did finally break and I was able to join up with some family and spend a normal (somewhat) holiday with them. I say somewhat b/c in my family nothing is ever quite normal. 🙂

Anyhoo, I could write more and more about how Iprayed, about how iIhealed my loathing toward these folks…And I probably will. For now my point: harboring resentment, hatred, or anger toward anyone, no matter how justified, will never get you where you need to go in your own journey. In fact, harboring this muckety muck will slow you down tremendously.

So no matter what, get into that thought of yours and start weeding out all the muck all the huggabaloo and all the icky stuff. You can do it. You deserve to do it. And what’s more, humanity deserves nothing less.

Enjoy your journey. Shoot me an email or gimme a call if you want some help with any of this or just wanna chat about it.

Be well….Tre 😉 evolveserenity@gmail.com; 305/394.1070 (At&t unlimited mins)

Criticize and condemn or COOPERATE and have COMPASSION?…We can do better….

Most women I interact with will admit they’ve experienced competition moreso than cooperation, have felt the sting of criticism more than the warmth of compassion, and run around with far more condemnations murmuring in their minds than compliments.

This post takes a peek at something that occurred last week in the blogoshere and on national television that has me asking this question:

What more can we do so that we feel honored by ourselves and each other? So that we know the bliss of cooperation, the beauty of compliments, and the glory of compassion—from ourselves and from one another?

First I wanna offer how I became intertwined in the discussion thread about a missed opportunity when several successful bloggers who are mothers were interviewed and then aired on MSNBC’s Today Show.

Next I wanna offer my perspective on the whole shebang.

Finally I’ll offer the example of Mary Baker Eddy that pulls me up from my bootstraps day in/day out for the achievements she mastered more than a century ago.

First the background.

Daily I read from several blogs and comment on them.
Last week, I became intertwined in a pretty large discussion over the blogosphere:

First, I read this post from a site i read regularly, bitchphd.com.
—a statement of support defending the nature of content a lot of mothers blog about.
I liked what I read and did what I typically do, I commented and moved on to read other posts in my RSS Feed Reader (I use NetNewsWire for blogs and NewsFire for news feeds).

But I didn’t get too far. Her piece made me really pause and think about the value of the contributions of moms or any blogger, about the validity of self expression, about how women writers are surely helping pave the way for women globally to experience more freedoms. I could go on and on.

The point here: I started percolating my own perspective on what I’d read…typical of anyone who is actively blogging and commenting. I wondered what I could offer–if anything new–to the discussion.

So rather than move on to my next feeds, I googled who she referenced—Heather Armstrong—and her blog ‘Dooce.com” and read this piece she offers to celebrate an anniversary of writing about her daughter.
I was moved and felt a connection with a life…a mother’s…and a daughter’s. And was just about to send a comment when my good friend blogger –Elizabeth at table4Five.com — instant messaged me about something and I asked her if she knew of this blog.

Not only did she know of it, she told me further of her own perspective on the interview of several mom bloggers including Heather and that I should watch the video about it and tune into the discussion threads (this means basically see who’s saying what on blogs about a common topic).

She gave me a link to a piece about the whole interview experience by one of the mom’s interviewed—a woman named Mir who blogs regularly at WouldaCouldaShoulda.
So I read Mir’s piece on blogher.com.
And I read the comments Mir refers to in her piece.
And then I even googled and read the excerpts of all the other women bloggers who were interviewed:
Jill Asher at svmoms.com and motherhooduncensored.com.

So you get the gist…how reading one blog and talking about it with another blogger sends you all over the blogosphere to find others who are discussing a similar topic.

And with this Today Show interview, it was clear: most bloggers I read all felt the interview dropped the ball….bigtime.

And so I began thinking further. Like why was any of this bothering me too?

On one level I felt compassion—kudos to any and all that spend so much of their lives offering their perspective of what’s working for them and then blog about it. And more kudos to the honest portrayal of lives. It builds connection and community and brings us all that much closer.

On another level I felt anger. How in the world is it possible that women in broadcast media can fail to emphasize the goods of the women bloggers in a nationally televised interview? Why were the substance of their efforts relegated to simply inquiries about privacy issues and other negative slants?

But I know me. Anger doesn’t get me anywhere.

So I thought about a favorite author—Mary Baker Eddy–whose every endeavor it seems was in taking a stand for authentic communication that mattered. She spent the better part of 40 years editing one text, Science and Health and because of her life achievements was dubbed by the National Association of Women Writers as among women “whose words have changed the world.”

And because she was so intensely aware of the need for objective reporting in the media, she didn’t just contribute articles to a local newspaper. She created one, an international daily in fact, the Christian Science Monitor—at a time when she felt objective reporting was vital to leaven the quality of content in the media. And to this day the Monitor still lives and breathes her original intent for it’s purpose “to injure no man and to bless all mankind.”

Okay…so here I was feeling compassion about the women who blog, a bit of miff-dom toward the interviewers, and then I’m reminded of Eddy’s example…

And so it made me pause and think and pray.

It’s not enough to just dwell—to me—on what was missing from the interview. That’s been discussed enough. And you can surely read about it doing your own google searches.

What I wish to offer is my perspective on lessons I’ve discerned in thinking and rethinking all of these conversations through.

All of these discussion threads make me ask the questions:
Why wasn’t there a greater celebration of achievements?
And more to the point: what am I doing with my own life to honor examples of success I come in touch with?

To me, the real learning I’m doing in sifting through all this stuff is asking those questions.

As a new blogger, I would have loved to ask these women about their successes and more. I would have asked them what started them blogging, what keeps them going, and how they would define the impact of their blogging on their own lives and on the lives of their readers. Heck, I may have even asked how their blogging is –to them—helping to evolve human rights as they further the right of each one of us to take a stand for our voices.

But it wasn’t long ago when I might have been a bit jealous of their achievements or worse, a bit more dumping on myself that I haven’t gotten further along in my own writings.

Think about it. When you see someone who is successful–whether in appearance, in their career, in their health/physique, in their relationships, what is your first thought?

Do you judge them negatively? Are you suspicious, critical, or apathetic? Do you inwardly cave and wonder what the heck is wrong with you? Or do you acknowledge achievements and applaud their efforts?

I would like to think we each and all celebrate one another’s successes.

We should!!!!

We share a commonness with all others that each one of us is on a journey. And someone’s successes — in whatever way– should be encouragement to each one of us that breaking through limitations is possible, doable, and proveable…on any scale, in any circumstance.

As I’m honest with myself, while I know this is my goal, it is not all the time where my thoughts first go.
Me being completely honest, when I see a woman—be it a mom, a peer, a woman senior to me….in whatever capacity that person is successful….I tend to wonder first things like: “How did she get there? What is she doing right?” Part suspicion, part genuine, sometimes jealousy, often my inner wonder. But I’m a far cry from fully embracing and honoring. I need to do better. I want to do better.

Sometimes I think I know. I say to myself: “Well she’s mastered thought by thought living and maintains peace and can hear her goals and not the muck of self condemnation, carves out a path for herself and just goes nuts. You could be there but aren’t b/c you’re too caught up in feeling incapable yourself. ”

Other times I just pause and think “I wanna be more like that” ( a type of criticism) or “how come I’m not there yet?” (a type of complaining) or worse, dumping on myself (a type of condemnation).

My point here: until we can look out at anyone’s successes and objectively celebrate their victories, we may fall into the trap of criticism, complaining or condemnation (which may have been what happened to those who interviewed the bloggers).

So for me…as I’m thinking broadly about this topic–how to celebrate one another’s successes–how to learn from them and more how to celebrate my own and honestly assess what needs improving, I’m remembering this simple but oh so vitally important commandment: “Love thy neighbor as thyself.’

Why?

Well, think about it. If you are striving to see yourself spiritually, as inherently good, than why would you settle for anything less when viewing ‘your neighbor’ even if that person is someone you’ve never met…even if that person is succeeding at his/her endeavor that you may not understand at all, why would you NOT ‘love him/her’ or rather see that individual wholely and purely?

We all have weaknesses. We all have those choices we made that we wished we hadn’t. We can all craft a laundry list of things we wanna be doing better. And everyone who’s achieved success in whatever way also has a laundry list that to him/her he/she could be doing better.

So why then–when we see someone who’s successful in whatever way–can’t we sit back and honor and celebrate it, compliment it, and even ask where/when appropriate for some help and guidance along the way?

What was lost from that interview can be found in our day to day: Each one of us can value the successes of another individual we admire while also honoring our own. We can learn from one another, honestly and gently self assess, and push ourselves to grow.

None of those mommy bloggers got where they are by believing that they would fail. None of them achieved readerships by writing about boring content and gossip. All of them got where they are because they were true to their innermost desire to give voice to their hearts. And they’ve helped several bloggers along the way.

And in the long run those examples are what to me will move society forward: people who succeed who are willing to cooperatively share what they’ve learned, compassionately offer help, and compliment others’ successes along the way.

All of us can right now think of 2 or 3 people who inspire us…and we can pick up the phone and / or shoot them an email and just ASK: hey, what’s making this work so well for you?

My friend Elizabeth at table4five.com has taught me so much about blogging. So have a bunch of writers I know over at spirit-on-the-job-dot-com (spotj.com) and still others at blogher.com. But I know I haven’t told them enough. Note to self: tell them!!!

To me it’s that simple. And what’s more, that person will know and feel that their efforts are appreciated.

Mary Baker Eddy writes this: “The good in human affection must have ascendency over the evil and the spiritual over the animal, or happiness will never be won. The attainment of this celestial condition would improve our progeny, diminish crime, and give higher aims to ambition.” (Science and Health, p. 61:4).

Cooperation, compliments, and compassion go such a long way. To me, those are the real lessons to learn from and live by.

What do you think?

Leave your comments or shoot me an email at evolveserenity@gmail.com. Be well and enjoy your journey thought by thought…..they matter much! Tre ~

Remember this…

Sweet sister of mine….remember this: you are a rock…a beautiful woman whose vigor and grace, strength and determination have brought you many victories and many moments of glee. You are a woman of integrity, of might….of humility and unselved love. You’ve poured nothing less than your all into your now the past every year that i’ve known you…:) you’ve been a mom to me and a sister…and no matter what, no matter what, you are loved….and you know this. you know this because when you calm the stirrings of thought and the fears and the shocking news stories, you feel that calm tenderness and hug…..you are not ever alone. you know this. you know this. you know this…

on mother’s day and always i thank you for always being there for me…for listening and leaning…for holding and helping…and at a time in your life when i know you need some help too, remember always i am here….and that i love you…..

we are each worthy of another’s love. and we are each able to outpour love to millions. no matter how love is reciprocated, whether one to one or one to the multitudes…..always know that whatever you send forth you are blessed by and receive back.

a good friend reminded me of a few lines Mary Baker Eddy penned in Science and Health and I’m still ever learning their true meaning. And so I offer them to you as a form of comfort and hope and love….
“Human affection is not poured forth vainly, even though it meet no return. Love enriches the nature, enlarging, purifying, and elevating it. The wintry blasts of earth may uproot the flowers of affection, and scatter them to the winds; but this severance of fleshly ties serves to unite thought more closely to God, for Love supports the struggling heart until it ceases to sigh over the world and begins to unfold its wings for heaven. ” (p.57:22)

I’m inspired by your stedfast trust…and pause in awe and deep gratitude for your strength. You just keep on keeping on my sweet sis….Love is nudging you and leading you right where and as you need to be.

Happy Mother’s Day sweet sis o mine 🙂

The sun is coming out…..

The sun is coming out….

Today was a bit dark and rainy….all day. Kinda like my mood this past weekend. I’ve had a lot of dark moments, a lot of lows. Been really angry and disappointed over someone’s actions. And it’s a time of really feeling like my sense of hope in humanity is really being challenged.

I’ve always sought to find the good in others and surely this hasn’t changed.

Innately, each one of us is an expression of Spirit, of the all loving, all present Being that is the one Mind. Surely we don’t see this character exhibited 24/7 by every human we know let alone ourselves. So choosing to defend that this true nature is the substance of everyone’s character…well some may laugh that this is even an intention or goal I have. But I do and I will keep on striving to defend each person’s spiritual substance, no matter what.

Yet when I feel attacked or when someone I love has been really wronged or harmed, it’s so hard to get past the human emotions of anger and bitterness..of resentment or frustration.

But still I strive and so I must. Because to be influenced by evil never does an ounce of good. …not for myself….not for my sibling…not for the whole of humanity.

I grew up learning the lesson to forgive my enemies. And so I tried to my whole childhood on into adulthood. But back then, I know I had a hard time with this. Because back then I felt like my forgiveness would somehow off them of the wrong they’d done. Like somehow the names they called me or whatever they stole from me (crimes of my elementary peers) was somehow tolerable because I wanted more to be their friend. For years I was taken advantage of I see now because a lot of my peers learned through my behavior that indeed I tolerated verbal abuse. In fact during one 6th grade lunch where the boys were against the girls in this tug of war thing, during my rather chubbier years, I distinctly remember one peer saying ‘Oh, that’s just Tresha the tubbolard. She won’t mind if you call her fat names. We’ve done it so much by now and she’s always your pal in the end.’

Something like that. Oddly enough, this same guy would be my date to the senior prom 6 years later. But what I’m getting to is that in the many years since 6th grade, I’ve learned so much more about the nature of that lesson to forgive your enemies.

To me it’s not at all anymore about growing tolerant of another’s wrong doings. Rather, it’s committing yourself to loving his/her true nature inspite of his/her wrong doing. Forgiveness is like a public affirmation that states “I’m willing to defend your true core and essence and to really love and cherish that about you.’

But here’s what forgiveness is not: it is not tolerance for evil of any kind. It is not weak heartedness that fears standing up for what is principled and what is honorable and what is moral. It is not defending someone’s wrong doing because somehow that wrong doing was justified.

Forgiveness doesn’t even mean you will stay close with another. But it does mean you will defend in your heart of hearts that person’s true substance is spiritual and therefore whole and free from all inclination toward wrongdoing.

The rains have subsided for this evening…and the sun is coming out again at least to share it’s final moments before it sets (and yes, I know, one day I’ll write the truth that the sun really isn’t setting at all, rather is the earth rotating….it just sounds so much more poetic)…and so with that rotation and seemingly setting of the sun, the light is appearing…and so too is it in my heart.

Surely my anger has subsided greatly….surely my frustration and sorrow are subsiding much. And at least for this hour I am finding myself able to move past my anger toward this other and really reach the depth of where I need to be: in cherishing his innate innocence and goodness. For in truth the ray of love he exudes hasn’t ever waned. And so I pray….